God works in chunks.

Okay, so it's not provable by some scientific analysis, and it's certainly not very eloquent.  But that's my theory.  God's work in our lives is often made known to us in big chunks.  It seems to me that we don't (well, at least I don't) generally see the day-to-day ways that God is moving in our lives.  The stuff that makes up the building blocks somehow is lost on us, and then, WHAM, we're overwhelmed by how the Spirit moves in and among us.  It makes me wonder sometimes if God just shakes his head and laughs, saying "When will you ever learn, Jennifer?  I am always with you; I am always at work in your life."  In fact, my experience proves that God is about carrying out His magnificent handiwork, in spite of the ways I might be out to unintentionally trump His goodness.

When my grandmother was near death, I was faced with a decision whether to leave her bedside to honor a concert obligation that had been booked well in advance.  My heart was not in leaving her.  I was tired both physically and emotionally.  I had no energy to travel, much less to share my story of faith with others.  I simply wanted to curl up in a ball and be left alone.  But upon conversation with Grandma, I traveled --reluctantly-- to give the concert and lead worship.  I wondered how in the world God was going to use me as His instrument to share His word with others when I felt so used up and closed off at that time.  It seems His message was intended for me, for it was there, in that place, at that concert, that God introduced me to the man He had planned for me.  Five days ago, we became engaged, as we sat together at the rim of the Grand Canyon, staring out in awe of God and all He creates.

Today, I was honored to be the featured guest and artist on a satellite television show which is to appear on the Angel Network.  But moreover, I was humbled by the opportunity to meet a couple who have pledged their lives for the sake of the Kingdom, reaching out to those with addictive behaviors and offering them the redeeming love of Christ; teaching the grace and freedom of God to those in prison; sharing their souls and their faith story all around the world.  Latrice, in congratulating me and wishing me God's continued blessings on my engagement and coming marriage, commented to me as I was packing up my things to leave after an afternoon of taping, "It seems to me you walked away from it all and ended up gaining everything."

And isn't that the mystery of faith?  God promises us blessing and abundance when we live in obedience to Him.  I am working to disprove my own theory by making the time to listen daily for God, so that I might be more actively involved in the life He continues to build for me.  Are you perceiving the building blocks in your life?

Grace and peace to you as you journey.

Yours in Christ,  

~~Jennifer

3/09/05

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